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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself: Tales From a Happy Life Without Kids

Penned By Jen Kirkman
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4.85
70,959 Global Ratings
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I Can Barely Take Care of Myself: Tales From a Happy Life Without Kids

Penned By Jen Kirkman
4.85 70,959 Ratings
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Editor's Note:
"You'll Change Your Mind." That's what everyone says to Jen Kirkman—and countless women like her—when she confesses she doesn't plan to have children. But you know what? It's hard enough to be an adult. You have to dress yourself and pay bills and remember to buy birthday gifts. You have to drive and get annual physicals and tip for good service. Some adults take on the added burden of caring for a tiny human being with no language skills or bladder control. Parenthood can be very rewarding, but let's face it, so are margaritas at the adults-only pool. Jen's stand-up routine includes lots of jokes about not having kids (and some about masturbation and Johnny Depp), after which complete strangers constantly approach her and ask, "But who will take care of you when you're old?" (Servants!) Some insist, "You'd be such a great mom!" (Really? You know me so well!) Whether living rent-free in her childhood bedroom while trying to break into comedy (the best free birth control around, she says), or taking the stage at major clubs and joining a hit TV show—and along the way getting married, divorced, and attending excruciating afternoon birthday parties for her parent friends—Jen is completely happy and fulfilled by her decision not to procreate. I Can Barely Take Care of Myself is a beacon of hilarious hope for anyone whose major life decisions have been questioned by friends, family, and strangers in a comedy club bathroom. And it should satisfy everyone who wonders if Jen will ever know true love without looking into the eyes of her child.

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Length 213 Pages
Language Eng
Imprint Simon & Schuster
Released April 16, 2013
Identifier (ISBN) 15757384
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Jen Kirkman
The Mind Behind the Work
Jen Kirkman

Jen Kirkman writes contemporary fiction and has always been fascinated by character-driven stories. They hold a degree in English Literature and previously worked as an editor before transitioning to writing their own books. Jen Kirkman lives with their spouse and a very vocal rescue cat.

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Critical Reception & Reviews

4.85
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Patricia Lewis
Patricia Lewis July 29, 2025
"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Christopher Thomas
Christopher Thomas February 26, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
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Donna Lopez
Donna Lopez June 04, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Michelle Roberts
Michelle Roberts April 04, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem."
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"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
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