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Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Penned By Maureen Johnson
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4.85
61,973 Global Ratings
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Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village

Penned By Maureen Johnson
4.85 61,973 Ratings
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Editor's Note:
Thinking of a foray to a quaint English village? You'll think twice after reading this tongue-in-cheek illustrated guide to the countless murderous possibilities lurking behind these villages' bucolic façades—from bestselling author Maureen Johnson and illustrator Jay Cooper.A weekend roaming narrow old lanes, touring the faded glories of a country manor, and quaffing pints in the pub. How charming. That is, unless you have the misfortune of finding yourself in an English Murder Village, where danger lurks around each picturesque cobblestone corner and every sip of tea may be your last. If you insist on your travels, do yourself a favor and bring a copy of this little book. It may just keep you alive. Brought to life with dozens of Gorey-esque drawings by illustrator Jay Cooper and peppered with allusions to classic crime series and unmistakably British murder lore, Your Guide to Not Getting Murdered in a Quaint English Village gives you the tools you need to avoid the same fate, should you find yourself in a suspiciously cozy English village (or simply dream of going). Good luck, and whatever you do, avoid the vicar.

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Length 128 Pages
Language Eng
Imprint Ten Speed Press
Released September 14, 2021
Identifier (ISBN) 57405598
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Maureen Johnson
The Mind Behind the Work
Maureen Johnson

Maureen Johnson is the author of several novels. Originally from the East Coast, they now live in the Midwest with family. In addition to writing, Maureen Johnson enjoys gardening, cooking, and reading way past bedtime. Their work often explores the complexities of everyday life and human relationships.

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Critical Reception & Reviews

4.85
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13%
3 star
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2 star
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Ryan Hernandez
Ryan Hernandez September 05, 2025
"An acceptable diversion. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Melissa Robinson
Melissa Robinson June 30, 2025
"A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
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Stephanie Lopez
Stephanie Lopez October 19, 2024
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A solid 4 stars from me."
Michelle Garcia
Michelle Garcia March 05, 2024
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Carol Campbell
Carol Campbell May 17, 2024
"I find myself somewhat conflicted. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. Perfectly average."
Melissa Taylor
Melissa Taylor January 30, 2025
"Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Jessica Clark
Jessica Clark December 02, 2025
"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. Quite impressive overall."
Laura Flores
Laura Flores October 02, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall."
Elizabeth Martin
Elizabeth Martin March 13, 2024
"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
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Steven Jackson April 20, 2024
"Not entirely to my refined tastes. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Perhaps more aligned with a different audience's tastes."
Melissa Hill
Melissa Hill July 28, 2024
"I was completely blown away. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Ashley Torres
Ashley Torres March 31, 2024
"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
John Anderson
John Anderson September 22, 2025
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
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Deborah Clark April 14, 2025
"Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
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Christopher Gomez September 15, 2024
"Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
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"I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Betty Wright
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"Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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Kevin Hill
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"A profoundly satisfying read. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"I find myself somewhat conflicted. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. A fair 3 stars."
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Joseph Taylor
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"I was completely blown away. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Rebecca Jones
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"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. A true literary gem."
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"Absolutely brilliant. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem."
Laura Torres
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"Masterpiece from start to finish. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
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"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Absolutely brilliant. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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"Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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Karen Johnson March 27, 2025
"An acceptable diversion. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Perhaps more aligned with a different audience's tastes."
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Margaret Taylor February 21, 2024
"I find myself somewhat conflicted. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
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"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Kevin Walker
Kevin Walker June 14, 2024
"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Robert Turner
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"Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars."
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"Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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"Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
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"A profoundly satisfying read. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Kimberly Miller
Kimberly Miller April 19, 2024
"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. Quite impressive overall."
Michael Green
Michael Green January 03, 2024
"Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
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Betty Garcia August 20, 2024
"I find myself somewhat conflicted. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. A fair 3 stars."
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"Exceeded all my expectations. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
Thomas Nguyen
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"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
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Matthew Nguyen April 05, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem."
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"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Donald Cruz
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"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars."
Edward Rivera
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"Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. Worth every moment spent reading."
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"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
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"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Christopher Gomez
Christopher Gomez December 10, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A very distinguished novel."
Amanda Lewis
Amanda Lewis December 12, 2025
"Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars."
Kevin Miller
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"Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me."
Gary Rivera
Gary Rivera June 07, 2025
"Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
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Dorothy Edwards February 28, 2024
"An acceptable diversion. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Perfectly average."
Mary Jones
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"Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Andrew Anderson
Andrew Anderson May 23, 2025
"A profoundly satisfying read. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Nicholas Jones
Nicholas Jones November 26, 2025
"It was adequate. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Suitable if your reading queue is empty."
Michelle Garcia
Michelle Garcia March 17, 2024
"A decent, if standard, experience. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Perfectly average."
Mark Jackson
Mark Jackson January 05, 2024
"I find myself somewhat conflicted. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. Perfectly average."
Kimberly Lee
Kimberly Lee December 19, 2024
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Jennifer Nguyen
Jennifer Nguyen December 01, 2025
"It was adequate. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Perfectly average."
Dorothy Moore
Dorothy Moore February 02, 2025
"A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend."
Laura Flores
Laura Flores December 10, 2024
"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Jacob Mitchell
Jacob Mitchell May 30, 2025
"A profoundly satisfying read. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars."
Margaret Campbell
Margaret Campbell July 09, 2024
"A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
John Jackson
John Jackson March 27, 2025
"It was adequate. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time."
George Clark
George Clark June 18, 2025
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem."
Melissa Robinson
Melissa Robinson October 01, 2025
"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Rebecca Smith
Rebecca Smith December 13, 2024
"Absolutely brilliant. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Kenneth Thomas
Kenneth Thomas May 01, 2025
"Not entirely to my refined tastes. The prose was competent, yet the characters lacked the depth I usually seek. A fair 3 stars."
Steven King
Steven King September 13, 2024
"A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars."
Joshua Lee
Joshua Lee December 17, 2025
"Excellent, though slightly flawed. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me."
Brian Hill
Brian Hill April 17, 2024
"I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author."
Sharon Collins
Sharon Collins December 13, 2024
"Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre."
William Hill
William Hill April 29, 2025
"A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. Quite impressive overall."
Patricia Robinson
Patricia Robinson February 15, 2024
"I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers."
Stephanie Rodriguez
Stephanie Rodriguez January 08, 2025
"Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Betty Wright
Betty Wright August 01, 2025
"I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem."
David Anderson
David Anderson January 27, 2024
"I was completely blown away. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece."
Robert White
Robert White February 12, 2025
"I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading."
Christopher Torres
Christopher Torres September 01, 2024
"A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel."
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